Barbarian Days.

Recently my father in law and I were talking about books. He has been trying to get me to read the Gray Man series as he gave me several of that serie’s books. Problem was he did not give me the first book in the series and I didn’t want to just go jump into a long series of book starting with book 3. So I started looking for where I could get the first one. Library was a no-go; they did not have it. Examined Half Price Books and they had it, but the shipping and handling costs were greater than the cost of the book. That was irritating. Then I heard about Thriftbooks - also from my father in law. Great prices as long as you are willing to be patient as the shipping times can be long. I bought the first book of Gray Man and also took a chance on the book Barbarian Days - A Surfing Life. It was a Pulitzer Prize winner so I figure it couldn’t be all that bad.

Turned out it was…well, an okay decision. Barbarian Days: A Surfing Life by William Finnegan is a memoir that delves deeply into several key themes, beyond just the act of surfing itself, but there was plenty of surfing talk; be assured of that. It was very apparent that the author was taking us on a autobiographical journey. In fact, at many times it seemed to me to be a vehicle for a personal catharsis.

Throughout the memoir, Finnegan explores how surfing has shaped his identity and personal growth. Surfing is not merely a hobby for him; it’s a way of life that influences his understanding of himself, his relationships, and the world around him. The book portrays surfing as a spiritual journey that allows Finnegan to reflect on who he is as an individual.

The book begins detailing Finnegan’s early life. While it was apparent he was a member of a loving family, to say his life was without strife. It would seem that as a youngster he was constantly an the outside due to the frequent moves made by their family as they followed their work. (His father was a producer for some small scale television shows and movies). But it was due to one of these moves that Finnegan arrived in Hawaii.

William is in the back-middle.

In Hawaii, in between fighting with locals where he seemed to learn about the hard knocks of life while being beaten up pretty regularly, he started surfing. He was only a short walk away from a beach which had good breaks so he was there learning about surfing every day.

One of the main points that I would like to make about this book is how much I learned about surfing. I was aware that it was a lot more than just getting a board and going out in the water. You do not just hop up on ride. There are a tremendous number of dangers that come with the sport. Finnegan details how he spent a long time learning by simply watching others as well as paying the closest of attention to the water and more importantly, what lied beneath it. Just because a great wave with a good great goes by does not mean you should try and catch it. If it rolls you and there happens to be a shallow spot of razor sharp coral, you could be in for a really bad day. The terms I learned: Lefts and Rights, eddies and tubes — it all took a good bit of time to understand (not that I entirely do now) what he was talking about. One of the things Finnegan wrote about being very afraid of was drowning when a series of waves could pin you underwater as you were waiting for a safe moment to come up and swim out. The waves took on a personality as he spoke of them. Waves are absolutely schizophrenic; one moment providing a ride that led to heart pounding excitement and awe, but could, without notice, place you in a life threatening situation where a single wrong move results in you being cut to shreds on coral and/or drowning.

It was during this bit of learning that I discovered that while you may think of surfers as they are represented in Hollywood, Jeff Spicoli comes to mind, they are incredibly observant and in tune with nature. I may sound like I am about to start chanting, (I’m not) but if you were not able to read the water and adapt to conditions you were not going to be a very good surfer and might end up on the wrong side of a wave pounding you into rocks.

“Well, I'll tell you, Stu, I did battle some humongous waves! But you know, just like I told the guy on ABC, "Danger is my business!" Jeff Spicoli

"All I need are some tasty waves, a cool buzz, and I'm fine."  Jeff Spicoi - Fast Times at Ridgemont High

The beauty, power, and unpredictability of nature are central to the narrative. Finnegan’s descriptions of the ocean and the waves are poetic, reflecting a deep reverence for nature’s magnificence and danger. The ocean becomes a character in the book, embodying both serenity and raw, untamable power, and surfers must learn to respect and coexist with it.

The memoir highlights how the pursuit of surfing can become an all-consuming passion. When I think of myself at 12 years old, what was important to me, it is a blur of ever changing interests. Besides baseball, nothing really stuck. Finnegan writes about getting up before dawn (no way I was doing that) and heading out to the beach and surfing prior to going to school. That is a single-minded dedication that is not often seen in an adult, much less in an early adolescent. But it is here where you start to see and understand what surfing means to Finnegan. He went to school and did pretty well, but I think the education he received while out on the waves interacting with people far his senior in age and experience was more impactful than any classroom.

Surfing is both a solitary and social activity, and the memoir reflects this duality. Finnegan’s relationships with other surfers—rivalries, friendships, and shared experiences—are a major part of the narrative. The surfing community plays a significant role in shaping his experiences, providing camaraderie but also competition. The connection experienced through surfing gave Finnegan and his friends a common path to travel. The obsession was shared with a select few and it allowed for experiences that only those dedicated to surfing can understand.

When I think of the word ‘obsession’ it more often comes with negative connotation. This is up for discussion in this book as well. If every move you make centers on how it will allow you to do something, you might need to take a long moment to think about the macro impact of what you are doing.

Finnegan sacrifices conventional career paths, relationships, and a stable life to chase the perfect wave. His obsession often leads to tension between his love for surfing and the responsibilities and expectations of adult life.

One of the other big ideals that challenged the way I thought was the freedom of movement Finnegan experienced. I am a Gen Xer and we often speak of how we only came home when the streetlights came on. Our parents did not know where we were, what we were doing, and we all came out okay…blah, blah. But that is nothing compared to Finnegan. As was the custom, Americans backpacked Europe after college, but William was hopscotching across Europe with a lot of story being told as he was 17 years old in Turkey. In Turkey! I would be nervous to go there by myself today.

This was indicative of the rest of Finnegan’s young life. Finnegan's life was marked by a constant search for new waves and new places. His passion for surfing takes him to remote corners of the world—Fiji, Samoa, Madeira, and beyond—capturing the thrill of discovery and adventure. He would work jobs with the goal being to save enough money to go on surf trips. He worked for a year or two on a railroad, saved $5000 which at the time was a significant sum of money, and left for the South Pacific. This journey lasted several years and ended with teaching english in South Africa during the height of the Apartheid struggle.

This journey was of course a great deal about surfing, but there was a great deal of self-discovery taking place as well. He spoke of not know what he wanted in life and how aggravating it was when he would at times look up from surfing and consider whether or not he was wasting his time and his life.

While it was not the path I have chosen, I think it is an incredible life’s journey he went on. We need to lionize those who are willing to put everything aside to chase a passion. If he had not went on this journey, I believe he would not have lived as satisfying a life as he did. He became an excellent writer and I am not talking about this book. He would eventually take a job as a correspondent at the New York Times and would go to all kinds of war zones and dangerous places. I do not think he could have done all of these things without the life-lessons learned while traveling and chasing waves.

All in all, it was an okay read. There were times when I was so far down in the weeds reading about the intricacies of surfing it made my head spin. And sometimes I would turn pages without reading if I thought it was more of the same. However, the book did keep me wanting more. I always kept going because I wanted to see how this or that travel experience ended. As the book wound down, he spoke more and more about how his age was impacting his surfing. I felt for him because I knew what surfing meant to him and I couldn’t imagine him being without it. As Finnegan ages, he reflects on how his body and his relationship with surfing change. It is a meditation on aging, time, and the inevitability of change, with surfing becoming a metaphor for life’s constant flux. There is a bittersweet tone as he grapples with the realization that physical limits will eventually impede his ability to surf in the same way he did in his youth. No one defeats Father Time.

But he came to peace with it. Marriage and children have a tendency to take your attention, but he was still able to continue traveling, it just wasn’t only to surf. HIs wife and daughter became partners in his unending wanderlust and he seemed very much at peace by the end of his story.

If you are a fan of surfing - this book is for you. There is a ton of surfing lingo and details; sometimes it became too much and therefore boring to me. WIth that being said, FInnegan still has a knack for storytelling, this I cannot deny. His story made me question whether or not I chase my passions enough, or for that matter, what are my passions? I think there is something very noteworthy when someone knows exactly what they want and do whatever they have to do to get it.

Keanu Reeves is a good dude.

Hollywood:  A place where big careers and humility are mutually exclusive.  Where self promotion is the way to what you want.  People are used as steps to your goal and having a conscience is something you have to be rid of as soon as possible.  Wait…am I talking about Hollywood or Washington DC?  Meh, I digress.

I say all of these things because it is even more astonishing that there are people who work in Hollywood who manage to not fall into this pit.   Keanu Reeves appears to be one of those people. 

Be mindful of this:  This article is not being written to discuss his acting ability.  I myself do not find him to be a terrible actor.  There have been some roles where he was wooden and definitely roles where he has seemed to be the stoner surfer quite a bit.  It is easy to label him as just the handsome guy and that is why he gets roles in movies.  But again – not why we’re here.  I want to discuss Keanu Reeves the man. So I will.

In the early part of his career he was only spoken of for his acting, but as time has passed, he has become known for being humble and generous, and for having a kind personality—qualities that seem to resonate with people on a deep level.  People were not aware of what kind of person he is due to in no small way his diligent work at being a private person.  In the last 5 years or so, the fact that he is a phenomenal guy has come to the forefront due in large part because of social media.

Despite being a huge Hollywood star, Keanu is famously humble. He avoids the spotlight, rarely engages in self-promotion, and has been seen using public transport like any regular person. His low-key attitude, even in the face of enormous success, makes him relatable.

I am not sure if this is where it really all started, but this video of Keanu Reeves giving up his seat for a woman carrying a heavy bag might be the first look at who he really is.  This seems like such a simple thing, but unfortunately this is really not a normal thing in today’s world.  Unlike many celebrities, he doesn’t let fame inflate his ego. There are countless stories of him chatting with fans, taking pictures with them, and treating people with kindness and respect, whether they’re fellow actors or everyday people he meets on the street.  There is another story that demonstrates this – he was on a plant bound for California that had to make an emergency landing.  Instead of sneaking away to travel on his own, he organized travel for many passengers, riding with them and telling stories. 

Respectful with women in a big way.  Keanu Reeves has become known for a unique and respectful gesture when taking pictures with women: he often poses with his hands hovering just above or beside them, without making physical contact. This subtle gesture has gained attention and praise on social media, where people have dubbed it the "hover hand" or the "respectful hand."  By not physically touching the women in the photos, Keanu demonstrates a respect for their personal space. In a time when conversations about consent and personal boundaries are more prominent, his gesture is seen as considerate and mindful.  Just another really cool way that he demonstrates he is the epitome of a gentleman.

Ever give away 31.5million dollars?  Keanu has.  After The Matrix, he gave that money to support cancer research in honor of his sister who died from leukemia.  This was equivalent to 70% of his total earnings from the movie.  Prior to that he sold his home to move closer to her so that he could help in caring for her.  This resulted in delays for the production of the Matrix sequels, but he knew what was important and people over movies. There are tons of other charities that he has donated to, but that is not where his generosity ends.  He cut 90% of his salary for the film The Replacements so that they could afford Gene Hackman’s salary requirements.  Does it end there?  Not at all.  He is a motorcycle aficionado, so he gifted all of the stuntmen for Matrix with brand new Harley Davidson motorcycles.  It doesn’t stop there.  For the John Wick films, he gave the stuntmen Rolex watches.  In the world of cheap, petty Hollywood stars, Keanu simply is not one of them.  

Keanu has faced tremendous personal loss—his father left when he was young, his close friend River Phoenix passed away, he lost a child, and his long-time partner also died tragically. He lost his sister to cancer.  Despite this, Keanu continues to live with grace, generosity, and positivity. Keanu often speaks about life in a reflective and thoughtful way. He’s known for giving interviews where he talks about the meaning of existence, death, and the importance of kindness, which adds to his aura of being "different" from other stars—more introspective and grounded.  There are two instances when being interviewed on the Colbert show we can see this.

And one more video - and this one pretty much says it all.

I’m not crying, you’re crying.

Arthur Morgan.  Video game character.  Not even real.  A figment of someone at Rockstar’s imagination,

So, what is the big deal?

The big deal is that he is the most complex, nuanced character I have ever ran into in a video game.  For that matter, I am not sure that I can easily identify a character that was as round as Arthur Morgan in any full length feature film.  He was evil, right down to his bones, but there were aspects of him that could be labeled as coming from the best of men.  It is such an emotional game due to its deep narrative, the aforementioned complex characters and the manner in which it explores the themes of loyalty, morality, and the inevitability of change.  Arthur Morgan is the epicenter of it all.

I have been meaning to write this for a while.  I don’t know – is this proof  that the character arc of Arthur Morgan has affected me?

Perhaps.

First of all, lets make it clear – Arthur is a killer and a thief.  He is a drunk who gets into fights and does not think twice to let violence solve his problems.  There are truly some despicable things that he does.  But here is where Rockstar decided to make it interesting – the player decides to a really large degree what kind of man Arthur is.  There are some things that are integral parts of the narrative where you have to commit crimes and…gulp…kill people, some who are lawmen trying to bring you to justice.  AKA – just doing their jobs, honorable jobs at that.  Maybe as people we have become totally numb to the violent ends of people, so much so that it we do not even think about it.  I know when I robbed a bank and shot a deputy, I did not think twice about it.

Judge me however you like for that.

There are many, many other times where you are given a choice in the manner in which you interact with the myriad NPCs that are in the game.  Most of the time it is really clear when you have a decision which will have a negative impact on Arthurs aura or a positive impact

RDR2 centers around Arthur Morgan’s character arc, living through the final days of the Old West. His evolution as a character—from ruthless enforcer to a man searching for redemption—is emotionally gripping. Arthur’s internal struggle, particularly as he reflects on his life choices, mistakes, and growing awareness of his own mortality, resonates deeply with players.

Arthur’s relationships with key characters like John Marston, Sadie Adler, and Dutch Van der Linde are full of nuanced emotional moments. His bonds with them—whether through camaraderie, love, or betrayal—are deeply fleshed out, adding layers of tragedy or warmth.  This is seen in the ways they speak about things and people from their past; these people did life together. The way these relationships evolve over the course of the game tugs at the player’s heartstrings.

The Van der Linde gang, the central group in the game, operates on the ideals of loyalty and family. However, as the story unfolds, we see that these bonds are tested, fractured, and often shattered, especially through the slow unraveling of Dutch, the gang’s leader. (He has a plan…) The tension between loyalty to friends and the painful realization that those friends might no longer be trustworthy creates powerful emotional stakes.

The setting itself—an era in decline, with the frontier giving way to modernity—adds a melancholic tone. Characters who once thrived in the untamed world of the Wild West must come to terms with the fact that the life they knew is ending. This overarching theme of inevitable change and loss contributes to the emotional weight of the story.

The game’s score, composed by Woody Jackson, adds significant emotional depth to pivotal moments. The hauntingly beautiful soundtrack enhances feelings of isolation, grief, and reflection throughout Arthur’s journey. The cinematic quality of the game, with its careful attention to detail in its environments, lighting, and facial animations, makes key emotional moments hit even harder.

Arthur’s grappling with terminal illness (tuberculosis) adds a layer of poignancy to his character arc. His search for meaning in his final days, his efforts to make amends for his past, and the choices players must make on his behalf (often determining his level of redemption) create an experience filled with bittersweet emotion.

This conversation that he has with a nun that come in and out of the story over the course of the game is really hard to hear.  Arthur is aware of who he is — and that is truly frightening to him as he knows his end draws near.  It seems to me that he is searching for meaning, to discover if his life had any real value.  This is something that is eminently relatable to everyone, as we are all searching for that.

Arthur’s last ride — I was so emotionally invested in Arthur at this point.  It was like I knew him, his good points and his bad points.  I had been with him during this journey and I clearly remembered the moments, the audio flashbacks played over a truly sad and reflective song.

The combination of music and cinematography was absolutely fantastic.

The multiple endings of the game, depending on the player’s choices, offer different but equally emotional conclusions. Whether Arthur dies with a sense of peace or unresolved guilt, his story remains tragic. Additionally, the epilogue, which ties the game to the original Red Dead Redemption, further intensifies the emotional experience by showing the long-term consequences of the gang’s actions.

It would take me a really long time to list out the ways that I lost myself in this game.  From hunting and fishing to taking care of my horse and saying ‘Hey there mister’ to everyone in Saint Denis I simply adored every aspect of this game.  It was like participating in a great movie.  The only bad things is that it ended.  There was a fairly significant epilogue which sets up RD1 that took me a really long time to get the hang of.  It was not the game, the mechanics were the same, but without Arthur, it just felt so wrong.  He was integral to my love of the game.  While there was some sort of closure in the game’s final moments, its just seemed so anti-climactic.  I have not played RD1 (Has not been on sale enough yet, dangit) so I am looking forward to seeing where the story goes.  It came out before RDR2 so I am wondering about how the quality of the graphics and whatnot will be, but heres to hoping that it will be half as good as RDR2.

RIP Arthur

The Matrix has you.

It is 1999 around 1am.  You are sitting on your couch watching a movie on your computer that has you totally enthralled.  Trouble is the movie crashes with an error message explaining that the file was corrupted.  (Ahhh, Napster anyone?)  After several attempts to play the file again, you give up dejectedly and try to figure out what to do.

What to do is get your clothes on and doggedly head out to the local Walmart.  It is a dodgy proposition considering what you might see at Wally during the day – as this is middle of nowhere rural Illinois, you know this is probably a bad idea.  Onward.

You come home with a VHS tape that you hurriedly pull the plastic wrap off of and jam into the VCR.  Fast forward to where you were and sit back down.  At least now you are watching it on the TV with a bigger screen.

This was how I became acquainted with The Matrix.  What a movie!  It had everything that I already knew made for a good action film and so many other things that I had never seen before.  It was just…cool.

The Matrix was easily one of the biggest hits of the 1990s and arguably one of the most influential action films of all time.  It spawned 3 sequels and made close to 2 billion dollars.  The Matrix” became a cultural phenomenon. Phrases like “taking the red pill” entered mainstream language, symbolizing waking up to uncomfortable truths. It inspired everything from fashion trends to philosophical debates, influencing pop culture, technology, and science fiction for years to come.

I teach Film as Literature and we are presently going through the sci-fi unit.  The Matrix was not on the list of movies to watch (there are some great ones on that list however – Interstellar, Arrival, 2001: A Space Odyssey, and Blade Runner, the 1982 version) so I let them start watching it while working on some other material.  I just think they had to be introduced to it.

First of all, the visual effects and cinematography were groundbreaking. The film introduced “bullet time” effects, where time slows down while the camera moves at normal speed. This innovation became iconic, influencing many action films and video games.  The Matrix’s choreographed fight scenes, particularly influenced by martial arts, are fluid and thrilling. The use of wire-fu techniques, along with stylized slow-motion and gravity-defying stunts, set a new standard for action cinema.  The blending of bleeding edge technology and classic cinematic techniques was incredible.  I particularly like the use of long, long takes.  It made you feel like you were there, totally immersed into the cyberpunk aesthetic.

All of that would be meaningless if it were not for some pretty cool storytelling.  The story idea was not new, but the concept of reality versus simulation was easy to buy into.  The question “Is this real?” is asked in many films, perception versus reality being a common theme, but free will and reality became really intertwined, and the allegory about waking up being thought provoking.  The movie taps into timeless concerns like control, freedom, rebellion, identity, and reality, which keep it relevant even decades after its release. Audiences continue to see The Matrix as a reflection of modern-day technology and surveillance, adding layers of meaning with each new viewing.

The Matrix also introduces viewers to a rich, complex universe filled with lore, such as the machine-controlled dystopia, the real world versus the simulated world, and the existence of Zion (the last human city). This detailed world-building lends a sense of depth and invites audience immersion.

The story of the Matrix is easily connected to Plato's work.

Character development was on point as well.  Morpheus, Trinity, Agent Smith: Each character is distinct, with clear motivations and personalities. Morpheus is the wise mentor, Trinity the strong and loyal fighter, and Agent Smith the relentless villain embodying the system’s oppressive force.  Their acting was, while at times wooden, pretty good overall for an action movie.

The movie had an impact on society as well.  Along with the aforementioned red/blue pill references, the amount of cool factor it had on society was immense.  Black leather, trench coats, sunglasses – combining this with crazy martial arts abilities and hacking skills – made them instantly iconic and in no small way contributed to the film’s lasting cultural appeal. When 90’s goth was beginning to die out, The Matrix brought it back again for its swan song.

This video says it all – even after 25 years, The Matrix stands the test of time.  It can be watched today, or for the umpteenth time, it does not disappoint.

What to do, what to do…

What to do.  Want to be creative – blocked.  What direction to take…is it to be things you are passionate about, or things you are good at already?  Both?  I have this platform and it is not being used for its specified purpose, so then why do I have it?

I am a hypocrite.  There is a student who I tell to, “make art!” — I do not follow my own advice.  This changes now.

So what does this mean?  It means that I am probably going to be producing some hot garbage.  It might have things that are going on in my life, pics/videos of my kids, and other projects that I am taking part in.  I do not know how or where this is going to go, but it is going to go.

Go make art.